An Awfully Big Adventure

An Awfully Big Adventure is a 1995 British coming-of-age film directed by Mike Newell. The story concerns a teenage girl who joins a local repertory theatre troupe in Liverpool. During a winter production of Peter Pan, the play quickly turns into a dark metaphor for youth as she becomes drawn into a web of sexual politics and intrigue.

The title is an ironic nod to the original Peter Pan story, in which Peter says, "To die will be an awfully big adventure." Set in 1947, the film was adapted from the Booker Prize-nominated novel of the same name by Beryl Bainbridge.

Plot
In the film's prologue, a hotelier ushers a child into a bomb shelter during the Liverpool Blitz. We see a brief flashback to a woman leaving her baby in a basement surrounded by flickering candles. Before departing from the house, she quickly drops a string of pearls on the child's pillow, twined around a single rose.

Years later, 16-year-old Stella Bradshaw lives in a working class household with her Uncle Vernon and Aunt Lily in Liverpool. Lacking an adult in her life to whom she feels close, she frequently goes into phone booths to "speak with her mother", who never appears in the film. Her uncle, who sees a theatrical career as being her only alternative to working behind the counter at Woolworth's, signs her up for speech lessons and pulls strings to get her involved at a local repertory theatre. After an unsuccessful audition, Stella gets a job gofering for Meredith Potter, the troupe's sleazy, eccentric director, and Bunny, his faithful stage manager.

The impressionable Stella develops a crush on the worldly, self-absorbed Meredith, whose homosexuality completely eludes her. Amused, he gives her the small role of Ptolemy the boy-king in Caesar and Cleopatra but ignores her otherwise. Meredith reveals himself to be an amoral, apathetic man who treats Stella and everyone else around him with scorn and condescension. He reserves his greatest cruelty for Dawn Allenby, a desperate older actress whom he callously dismisses from the company; she later attempts suicide.

Meredith also has a long history of preying upon young men. Stella is quickly caught up in the backstage intrigue and also becomes an object of sexual advances from men in and around the theatre company, including P. L. O'Hara (Alan Rickman), a brilliant actor who has returned to the troupe in a stint playing Captain Hook for its Christmas production of Peter Pan. In keeping with theatrical tradition, O'Hara also doubles as Mr. Darling.

O'Hara carries himself with grace and charisma, but privately is as troubled and disillusioned as the other members of the cast. Haunted by his wartime experiences and a lost love who he believes bore him a son, O'Hara embarks on an affair with Stella, to whom he feels an inexplicably deep emotional connection. Stella, who is still determined to win over Meredith, remains emotionally detached, but takes advantage of O'Hara's affections, seeing an opportunity to gain sexual experience.

The last straw for Stella is during a cast outing when Geoffrey, a fellow teenage stagehand whom Potter has been sexually toying with, bursts out and hits him in the nose. The cast rushes to comfort Geoffrey, but Stella exclaims that he ought to be sacked. O'Hara explains to her that Meredith has spent his life harming people like Geoffrey and causing pain to people like Bunny who really love him: "believe it or not, it doesn't much matter him or her, old or young to Meredith. What he wants is hearts."

Concerned, O'Hara visits her aunt and uncle, who disclose Stella's history. He finds out that Stella's long-missing mother was his lost love, whom he then knew by the nickname Stella Maris, making Stella ⁠— whom he's been sleeping with ⁠— his child, a daughter rather than the son he had imagined. Keeping his discovery to himself, O'Hara gets on his motorcycle and drives back out to the seaport.

He distractedly slips on the wet gangplank, hits his head, and is pitched into the water. Before he drowns, he sees the woman from earlier flashbacks, clutching the infant. Stella is later seen hastening to the phone booth to confide her woes over the phone. The absent Stella Maris had years ago won a nationwide contest to be the voice of the speaking clock. It is her recorded voice that provides the only response to her daughter's confidences.